Making Changes

Watch carefully, the magic that occurs, when you give a person just enough comfort, to be themselves – Atticus

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Hey friends,

I have been missing the blog world for a while now and I have been holding back for a couple of reasons… My life has been going through a number of changes over the past six months and I am not one to share my personal details with the world. At the same time, I believe in true authenticity and being real with my readers. In order to avoid sacrificing my values, I chose silence instead of over-sharing or acting like life was splendid, when it was not. I am also coming to the conclusion that my vision for starting this blog no longer feel true to who I am. Even the title of the blog feels completely disconnected and it does not feel like the proper place for my voice.

Here’s the thing: I started this blog with the intentions of sharing about my life, about yoga and health and DIY projects and marriage. This would be the forum for me to share fun stories about building chicken coops with my father-in-law, having weekend shooting adventures with my hubs, and explain how I can still maintain my healthy lifestyle and love for yoga amongst the beer and goofiness of being married to cowboy-hat-wearing husband. But, that’s not my life right now.

In April, I decided the best decision for me was to move out of my husband’s house. I have refused to speak about this publically for fear that people would not understand. I feared that people would say things like “I told you not to get married so young” or “you should’ve tried harder,” etc. And I get it! I have judged people in the past for making decisions like mine and only now do I fully acknowledge that there is always a story behind people’s decisions that no one, other than the person living it, can comprehend. I also have hopes that I will still work things out with my husband and I figured that going “public” with any information about a separation would only make it harder for me to explain things down the road. I’m a people pleaser and have lost my voice for fear of judgment.

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And I would like to tell you that I am “rising above” and am posting this today with triumphant courage about how I am going to use my voice genuinely without fear of critique, but that wouldn’t be true. In fact, I have sweat leaking from my pits and have already erased and restarted this post many times. And I will probably make a few (hundred) more edits after I am finished ranting.

However, I still want to share my story with you. Not the messy details of my shitty situation, but the victory of getting up in the morning when I feel like it has all gone to hell. About how I am so grateful for yoga and being a teacher because it has forced me to get to class when I most needed it, but was most reluctant to get onto the mat. About how many times I have eaten chips and salsa and a six pack of beer for dinner, only to find new appreciation for my health food enthusiasm the next day.

You see, I did not want to get on here and write posts about how I have all of the answers and how I know everything about battling depression through yoga or eating healthy when you don’t feel like it. Because fuck it; that’s completely unrealistic. But I do want to tell you all about how much I try, some days harder than others… but I try to gear my life towards positive, towards healthy, towards something better than it is in this current moment. And I want to continue sharing with you.

Therefore, I may be slowly transitioning to a new blog. I don’t have a clue what that blog will be called or what it will look like or whether I will stick to it. Who knows?! What I do know is that change is inevitable and I do not owe it to anyone to be the same person tomorrow as I am today.

Besides, change can be beautiful, right?

XOXO Taryn

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5 Ways I Practice Self Love

I  have come to believe that caring for myself is not self indulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival. – Audre Lorde

I have been preaching about self love the last couple of days in my yoga classes, which has moved me to write this post. Often times, I mention self love and self care and receive some eye rolling and laughs from people. This breaks my heart! There is some terrible message out there telling people that self care is silly or self improvement is for losers. This cannot be further from the truth! Media and society fill the world with lies, claiming “once you have a better body, you will love yourself and be happy” or “with this shiny new car, you will feel confident” or “once you find the one who ‘completes’ you, you will be happy”. These are LIES! Happiness is found when we are able to find it within ourselves and acts of self love will help you get there.

The other big lie we hear about self love is that it is selfish or narcissistic. I’m pretty tired of hearing those two wor8e00fbb61eb51394a66cab05baa7a45ads being used so casually. Being able to take care of ourselves will help us take care of others. It is about replenishing our own resources so we can continue to share, or else we will deplete ourselves to the point of helplessness and will be of no use to anyone we care about. When we practice self love, we can push through the limiting beliefs that the world has put on our shoulders and we can live life radiantly.

Self love is a daily practice. Some days are easier than others. Some days, we face challenges or hear lies about ourselves (both within our heads or through the opinions of others) and we let it consume us. The biggest thing to remember about self love is to NEVER beat ourselves up when we have off days. Shit happens. We must continue to talk to ourselves with pure kindness, embracing ourselves when we are down, and lifting ourselves back up, ready to try again.

Ready to start showing yourself some love? Take a deep breath in, give yourself a tight hug, and remind yourself: I AM WORTHY OF LOVE. Let’s get to it 🙂

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HERE ARE FIVE WAYS THAT I PRACTICE SELF LOVE AND WHY YOU SHOULD TOO:


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1. Eat like you care! Be honest about this one. How much time and consideration do you put into your food and eating habits? Are you eating because you are bored, upset, or hungry? Are you eating foods that are high in grease, fats, and sugars? Or are you filling your body with colorful, nutrient rich foods designed to fuel you up? Your body is craving for nourishment. One of the best ways you can express love for the body is by giving it the tools it needs for success. Listen to your body’s needs. Slow down and really enjoy the first 3 bites of every meal. Contemplate the texture, the taste, the richness of the different flavors. And give appreciation. If you can change anything about your eating habits, simply slow down and be grateful!

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2. Repeat affirmations DAILY. This is a big game changer for me and it sounded really stupid to me in the beginning too, don’t worry. I challenge you to make a habit of saying loving affirmations to yourself aloud at least once a day (preferably first thing in the morning). I also encourage you to say these things to yourself while looking into a mirror. Trust me, it is not as crazy as it sounds. There are many affirmation ideas all over the web. You can also purchase affirmation cards, books, signs, etc. You can change it up every day or you can pick one affirmation that truly speaks to you and use that same one daily. If you like the idea of consistency, try taping the affirmation to your bathroom mirror or you can make your own piece of pretty artwork to display and remind yourself (or you can order one from me).

Here are some super simple affirmations that really click with me:

  • I am worthy (of love, abundance, beauty, etc.)
  • I am enough
  • I am valuable
  • I am perfectly imperfect
  • I can accomplish anything I put my mind to
  • I love my body. It is strong, beautiful, and capable
  • I am grateful for the abundance in my life

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3. Enjoy stillness. It is important to take time for rest and quiet. I know we are all busy and we are filled to the brim with obligations and to-do lists, making it difficult to set aside time for ourselves. However, it is absolutely necessary to our self care. Make this a priority. Maybe wake up a little bit earlier, while the rest of the house is still asleep, or explain to your family that in order to do more for them, you need ten minutes for yourself and go lock yourself in a room. I can promise you, everyone can handle at least 10 minutes without your help. Of course, if you have toddlers home, you may find it a little more difficult to them to fend for themselves. However, you can make it a priority to take ten minutes for yourself when they are down for a nap before you start on a list of chores. This should be non-negotiable. Stillness can be anything that involves quiet and peace. You can spend some time in meditation (guided or silent) or relax into a steamy bath with luxurious bubbles or salts. It doesn’t make you are not moving at all, just peacefully. You can enjoy some creative work, tend to your garden, color, read a book. But it is time for you and only you!

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4. Enjoy movement. As important is it is to slow down and find stillness, it is just as vital to find energizing movement. Hopefully, something that you love! The gym may not be your thing, yoga may not be your thing, biking may not be your thing. However, there is some kind of movement that will excite you, you simply need to find it! Create a fun family workout routine, go for a jog, go play kickball at the park, go to a Zumba class or kickboxing class or crossfit class, go hiking, go dancing, do yoga. I don’t care what you do, but move! With movement, you will learn more about your body and everything it is capable of. Do not focus on its limitations, but find amazement in what you can do. If your movement gets you outdoors, even better! We all need a little more vitamin D in our life.

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5. Date yourself. This is my favorite act of self love and probably the one that sounds the silliest… I decided a long time ago that I am more than capable of doing things for myself and I should. I buy myself flowers, with no shame! I write myself love notes to put on my desk. I get dressed in my favorite clothes, put on some bitchin’ lipstick, and wear some yummy perfume; just for me! I tell myself, “Damn, you look good!” Selfies encouraged! I make it a habit to take myself out. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. I go to the movies, to dinner, to the park, on a solo day trip. Sometimes, I just stay in and do something I love. Dating yourself is about treating yourself with respect and having some fun along the way. I dare you: write down a list of things you LOVE to do, new things you want to try, or places you want to go. Now, pull out your planner and start scheduling your date nights. I aim for at least one per month. Put it on your planner with a pen or even a permanent marker. This is your “me time” and it is not selfish. It is essential.


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It doesn’t matter if you are single, dating, married, divorced, etc. Make it a priority to take time out to practice self care. Enjoy your own presence and become your own best friend. It does not make you crazy, it makes you better connected to your mind, your body, and your soul. Understanding who you are can help refresh all the relationships around you, learning how to step away from those which are not healthy and how to show sincere gratitude to the friends and family that nourish you.

I would love to hear what you think. Have you ever been on a self date? What did you do? How do you like to practice self care?

Happy Friday, y’all! Namaste 🙂

Taryn

Update: From Burnt Out to On Fire!

“Be who you were created to be and you will set the world on fire” – St. Catherine of Sienna

I am so excited to give you all an update on how I have been doing since my posted titled: Confession, I am burnt outI had such an out pour of support from family, good friends, and acquaintances and I felt so loved and understood. Getting everything off my stress and admitting how I felt really gave me the courage and motivation to lay it all out and let it all go. I did not beat myself up or let shame dwell inside me; I simply walked away. I thank you all for letting me use this as a platform for my transformation.

It’s been a few weeks, so obviously, life isn’t perfectly transformed. However, I feel so different. I feel excited for the future and eager to grab a hold of every opportunity that crosses my path. Let me tell ya, that’s huge improvement!

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I read this great article today: 10 Simple Act of Radical Self-Care by Mind Body Green. I just read this a few hours ago, but it perfectly sums up some of the commitments I have made to myself and it is a good read for anyone needing some motivation. (It is funny; just last week I had a co-worker tell me that the concept of “self-love” was for hippies, so I have been sharing these articles with her. This one is perfect)

#6 on the list has been HUGE for me! It isn’t just about forgiving myself, it’s about letting go of my high expectations. Can I tell you something crazy? As soon as I let go of my desire to complete my yoga teacher training by the end of this year, it suddenly became possible. Letting go of the expectation removed the negative energy I had directed at my yoga homework and practice. Now, I am eager to get homework done and learn more things. I have stopped finding excuses for why I can’t get things done or try something new and I am finding many reasons for why I can and should! I feel like I am on fire about yoga again, especially after taking the time to expand my horizons and try something new: acro yoga! I am in love!

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Another major practice I have implemented into my life is meditation (#1 on the Mind Body Green list). Not that I never meditated before, but I never made it a priority. I meditated maybe once a week, and felt terribly guilty about how terrible I was for not being yogi enough. Again, as soon as I let go of that expectation and reminded myself that it is just as important as brushing my  teeth in the morning, it became easier. I’m not gonna say I have sat down every morning, but almost!

Changing my perspective about everything has been such a game changer for me. I am working hard to remove negative words from my vocabulary and find the good in my life. I am practicing gratitude and acceptance. I am putting my health first, because I can’t take care of anyone else if I am not taking care of myself.

However, I swear the best change I have made is #10 on the list: Do what you LOVE. It is such a simple concept, but it is making such a difference in my life. Let me give you some examples of the silly, fun, and positive activities I have been adding to my life:

Audio books: I feel sad about the lack of time in my life to sit down and read a book, but audio books are perfect for my long drives. I am absolutely in love with Amazon’s Audible membership. I suggest reading Brene Brown. Her audio book The Power of Vulnerability is just amazing!

Singing and dancing: If I am not listening to an audiobook in the car, I am singing. AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS! I am jamming to Glee, passionately bellowing love songs (to myself!), and my animation goes through the roof when I start playing my Disney tunes. I am not embarrassed by passer-byers, I am thriving in my courage to do whatever the f*** I want! (safely of course!) I also dance in the kitchen and sing to my dogs, which I think really annoys them…

Doodling and journaling: About nothing, about everything, zentangles, alphabets, you name its.

Smiling. For. No. Reason.

Calling friends: This is one of my all time favorite activities, as most of my friends are really far away.

Baking. New Recipes. Documentaries. The list goes on and one. Actually, I have made myself a fun list of things I can do when I need a pick-me-up:

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I wish I could explain to everyone how different I feel. I hope you can hear a change of tone in my writing, as those around me are seeing. I even had a fellow classmate tell me I was “glowing love and happiness” the other day. Who? ME? YES!!! I am dreaming. I am making goals. I am optimistic. I feel connected with my husband more than I have in months. I feel confident. I hope you are all feeling confident too. Radical self-care is soooo important!

I love you all. Keep dreaming and keep doing the silly things you love.

xoxo Taryn

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