” I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.” – E.B. White
Hello awesome people! Yes, I’m still here… just stuck in a rut of feeling like I have little to talk about. I promised I wouldn’t turn this page into an ad for my business, but it has been consuming most of my free time lately, so I feel like there is nothing left to talk about. I’m doing other things, of course… I am always doing other things, but nothing which I find interesting enough to write about.
I’m stuck in a rut that I know a lot of you experience. This feeling that I am always too much and too little of everything, all at the same time. It’s exhausting. The criticism I give to my own “flaws” is just ridiculous. And I know that, deep down! I really do. I love who I am and I don’t want to change who I am at all. So why am I acting so crazy?
I’m sure you can all relate to some of these thoughts: I should be giving more time to others. I need to start spending more time taking care of myself. I really spend too much time in the kitchen. I need to stop being so lazy and start making myself healthier lunches. I need to be waking up earlier to do more yoga. I need to be getting more sleep. I need to put more time into my business. I need to give more time to my family. I should be more selfless in my marriage. I should be asking for my needs to be met in my marriage. I’m not smart enough to run a business. I’m not creative enough to sell things, etc.
It goes on and on. You can all see that everything I continue to beat myself up about is completely contradictory, right? Too much. Too little. And I haven’t wanted to write about anything because I am not feeling all put together lately, like I should be if I am going to write a blog to encourage others. I should keep my insecurities at bay. Right?
Hmm… Maybe not. I didn’t start this blog to be perfect and teach others perfection. I started this blog to encourage others to love themselves, improve their lives through the little things, and share my passions. I made this blog to be REAL with people.
Man, what I load off my shoulders. People, listen. I am not perfect! I talk about the importance of a morning schedule, but I oversleep ALL of the time. I talk about eating right, but there are nights I eat chips and guacamole for dinner (with no guilt, it’s delicious). My husband and I have had a rough first year of marriage and my relationship is far from perfect. And that’s all okay!
I just want to get this point across: the people who write the blogs you follow are human. They have flaws that they probably don’t talk about all the time. For a long time, I compared everything in my life to the bloggers I followed. I would look at their happy, healthy pictures and loathe myself for not being as committed as they are. I would look at their budget plans and panic about our household spending. I became so obsessed with being the “perfect wife” (according to blogs) at the beginning of my marriage, that I soon started attacking my husband for not being a “perfect husband” too.
I say all this to remind you all that there is no such thing as perfect. It is great to have people we look up to for guidance, but please never let yourself get caught up in what everyone else is telling you to do. Trust yourself and don’t every try to fit into a mold.
You are not too much or too little of anything, especially if you are being yourself. Do not let others, internet and magazines included, define you. EVER. Once the expectations of who we should be are gone, we can strive, as ourselves! No judgment. No guilt. PLEASE!
Wow. See? I already feel better. This is why I blog 🙂
Love y’all, Taryn xoxo